It can be incredibly difficult to watch someone you care about struggle with their mental health. You might feel helpless, unsure of what to say or do and even afraid of making things worse.
Know that your desire to help is already a significant first step.
Supporting a friend or family member struggling with mental health is a delicate but crucial act of love and compassion.
It requires empathy, patience and a willingness to learn.
This post will provide you with practical guidance on how to offer meaningful support, navigate challenging situations and prioritize your own well-being while helping someone you care about.
Understanding Mental Health Challenges
Before offering support, it's important to understand that mental health challenges are complex and varied.
They can range from temporary periods of stress and anxiety to more persistent conditions like depression, anxiety disorders, bipolar disorder and schizophrenia.
- Mental health is a spectrum: Just like physical health, mental health exists on a spectrum. Everyone experiences fluctuations in their mental well-being.
- Mental illness is not a choice: Mental illnesses are medical conditions that can affect anyone, regardless of age, gender, race or socioeconomic status.
- Stigma is a barrier to help: Stigma surrounding mental health can prevent people from seeking help and talking openly about their struggles.
- Recovery is possible: With the right treatment and support, people can and do recover from mental health conditions.
Practical Ways to Offer Support
Here are actionable steps you can take to support a friend or family member struggling with their mental health:
1. Listen Without Judgement
- Create a Safe Space: Let them know you're there to listen without judgment or criticism.
- Pay Attention: Give them your undivided attention, making eye contact and putting away distractions.
- Validate Their Feelings: Acknowledge their feelings and let them know that their experiences are valid. Avoid minimizing their struggles or telling them to "just snap out of it".
- Resist the Urge to Fix: Your role is to listen and support, not to offer unsolicited advice or try to "fix" their problems.
- Use Empathetic Language: Use phrases like "That sounds really difficult," or "I can only imagine how you must be feeling".
2. Educate Yourself
- Learn About Their Condition: Understanding their specific condition can help you better understand their symptoms and challenges.
- Reliable Resources: Use reliable sources of information, such as the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), the Mental Health Foundation or the World Health Organization (WHO).
- Avoid Stereotypes: Be aware of the stereotypes surrounding mental illness and challenge your own biases.
- Understand Treatment Options: Familiarize yourself with the different treatment options available, such as therapy, medication and support groups.
3. Encourage Professional Help
- Suggest Therapy or Counselling: Gently suggest that they consider seeking professional help from a therapist or counsellor.
- Offer to Help Find a Therapist: Offer to help them research therapists or counsellors in their area.
- Accompany Them to Their First Appointment: If they're hesitant, offer to accompany them to their first appointment for support.
- Respect Their Decision: Ultimately, the decision to seek professional help is theirs. Respect their decision, even if you disagree with it.
- Normalise Seeking Help: Remind them that seeking mental health care is a sign of strength, not weakness.
4. Be Patient and Understanding
- Recovery Takes Time: Understand that recovery from a mental health condition is a process that takes time and effort.
- Setbacks are Normal: Be prepared for setbacks and don't get discouraged.
- Offer Unconditional Support: Continue to offer your support, even when things are difficult.
- Avoid Pressuring Them: Avoid pressuring them to get better or to do things they're not ready for.
- Celebrate Small Victories: Acknowledge and celebrate small victories along the way.
5. Offer Practical Assistance
- Help with Everyday Tasks: Offer to help with everyday tasks, such as grocery shopping, cooking, cleaning or running errands.
- Offer Transportation: Offer to drive them to appointments or social events.
- Help with Childcare: Offer to babysit their children to give them a break.
- Help with Pet Care: Offer to walk their dog or care for their pets.
- Be Specific in Your Offers: Instead of saying "Let me know if you need anything," offer specific help, such as "Can I pick up groceries for you this week?"
6. Encourage Healthy Habits
- Promote Healthy Diet: Encourage them to eat a healthy diet and avoid processed foods, sugary drinks and excessive caffeine or alcohol.
- Encourage Exercise: Encourage them to engage in regular exercise, even if it's just a short walk each day.
- Promote Good Sleep Hygiene: Encourage them to establish a regular sleep schedule and create a relaxing bedtime routine.
- Limit Screen Time: Encourage them to limit screen time, especially before bed.
- Encourage Mindfulness: Encourage them to practice mindfulness techniques, such as meditation or deep breathing exercises.
7. Help Them Stay Connected
- Combat Social Isolation: Social isolation can worsen mental health symptoms. Encourage them to stay connected with friends and family.
- Invite Them to Social Events: Invite them to social events, even if they're hesitant to go.
- Offer to Accompany Them: Offer to accompany them to social events to provide support.
- Encourage Hobbies and Interests: Encourage them to pursue hobbies and interests that bring them joy.
- Connect Them with Support Groups: Help them find local support groups or online communities where they can connect with others who understand what they're going through.
8. Recognize Warning Signs and Know What to Do in a Crisis
- Learn About Warning Signs: Learn about the warning signs of a mental health crisis, such as suicidal thoughts, self-harm or psychotic symptoms.
- Have a Plan: Have a plan in place for what to do in a crisis situation.
- Know Emergency Numbers: Know the emergency numbers for your local mental health services.
- Stay Calm: If they're experiencing a crisis, stay calm and reassure them that you're there to help.
- Don't Leave Them Alone: Don't leave them alone if they're experiencing suicidal thoughts or self-harming behaviors.
- Seek Immediate Help: If they're in immediate danger, call emergency services or take them to the nearest hospital.
9. Take Care of Yourself
- Set Boundaries: It's important to set boundaries to protect your own mental and emotional well-being.
- Don't Overextend Yourself: Avoid overextending yourself and taking on too much responsibility.
- Seek Support for Yourself: Seek support from trusted friends, family members or a therapist.
- Practice Self-Care: Make time for activities that bring you joy and help you relax.
- Remember You Can't Fix Everything: Remember that you can't fix everything and that it's okay to ask for help.
- Recognize Your Limits: Acknowledge your own limitations and don't feel guilty for not being able to do everything.
What Not to Do
- Don't Minimize Their Feelings: Avoid saying things like "It's all in your head" or "Just get over it".
- Don't Offer Unsolicited Advice: Avoid offering unsolicited advice or telling them what they should do.
- Don't Compare Their Experiences: Avoid comparing their experiences to your own or to others.
- Don't Judge Them: Avoid judging them or making them feel ashamed of their struggles.
- Don't Break Confidentiality: Respect their privacy and avoid sharing their personal information with others without their consent.
- Don't Enable Unhealthy Behaviors: Avoid enabling unhealthy behaviors, such as substance abuse or self-harm.
TouchBase: Strengthening Your Support Network
While TouchBase cannot directly address mental health issues, it can be a valuable tool for maintaining and strengthening your support network, which is essential both for the person struggling and for you as a caregiver.
- Track Important Details: Use TouchBase to remember important details about your friend or family member's life, such as their favorite activities, triggers or coping mechanisms.
- Schedule Regular Check-Ins: Use TouchBase to schedule regular check-ins with your friend or family member to stay connected and offer support.
- Coordinate Support Efforts: Use TouchBase to coordinate support efforts with other friends and family members, ensuring that everyone is on the same page and that no one is feeling overwhelmed.
- Keep Track of Important Contacts: Use TouchBase to keep track of contact information for therapists, doctors, support groups and other resources.
- Remember Self-Care: Use TouchBase to schedule reminders for your own self-care activities, ensuring that you're taking care of yourself while supporting others.
Conclusion
Supporting a friend or family member struggling with mental health can be challenging, but it's also incredibly rewarding.
Remember that you're not alone and that there are resources available to help you and your loved one navigate this journey.